Thursday, July 31, 2008

Sacbee Blog: Artest Interview

"This is Tracy and Yao's team, you know. I'm not going to take it personal. I understand what Yao said, but I'm still ghetto. That's not going to change. I'm never going to change my culture. Yao has played with a lot of black players, but I don't think he's ever played with a black player that really represents his culture as much as I represent my culture. Once Yao Ming gets to know me, he'll understand what I'm about. Sometimes it's hard to get to know Ron Artest because I'm so down to earth to a fault...

"They would've been over the hump if Yao Ming hadn't gone down. They were having a great season. I'll come off the bench, I don't care. Let Shane start, and bring me off as a sixth man or seventh man. I would love to come off the bench in Houston. It doesn't even matter...

"It's his team, it's him and Tracy's team. But when I come in there, I'm definitely going to play my game and play to win. I'm definitely going to play with my ghetto and my hood roots. I'm going to play hard, and I'm going to play just like my culture taught me how to play...

"Yao Ming is a different type of person where he's not from a ghetto in America, so he doesn't understand how someone from the ghetto really acts. And I'm like one of the most ghetto-ist guys in the NBA...

"Whatever Yao Ming wants me to do, I'll be there. Whatever Tracy McGrady tells me to do, that's how it's going to go down. Ultimately, whatever Rick Adelman tells me to do is exactly what I'm going to do."

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Yao and Scola TEXT! AWESOME

So Yao and Scola text eachother? that is the most hilarious thing I have ever heard. All I need to know is that Dikembe's going to get an AOL screen name and I will piss my pants....

I was thinking:

" NotInMyHouse55 "




"hey scola whatsup"

S: "I am just combing my magnificent hair. What is up with you YAO"scola

Y: ".....Halo"

S: "Who is Ronald Artest? I like Battier. If he tries to take my rebounds off the glass I will get argentinian on his ass. MANU TOLD ME HE THREW AN ELBOW AT HIM"

Y: " Manu is a pussy Scola...The only thing worse than a crying Manu is a Crying Tim Duncan"

S: "Ye, u right... gtg xoxo"

Y: " lol, u2 ttyl!"

Rodman prediction

So, maybe I was pushing it a little for Dennis Rodman. But looks like we got a step up from him...


"I'll be a kid in a candy store," Artest said. "I'll be a kid in a store with a lot of candy. I'm going to dance with the stars."

Said Artest: "Boston kind of blitzed the whole league with that trio they have. To pretty much compete for a championship, you need a trio and some great role players. I guess if it's McGrady, Yao and Artest ... I'll let everybody else do the math."

"I haven't spoken to anybody yet," Artest said. "But if that's true [about a Houston trade], I don't even know what to say. I could be amazing. I don't even know the potential.

"I just think so highly of Mr. Adelman that I can't really speak on it. When I first got to Sacramento [in 2006], he believed in me. I said, 'Coach, we're going to the playoffs,' and everybody laughed at me. He said, 'Ron, we're going to go as far as you take us.' I've never had a coach do that before.

"How can you say no to Rick Adelman? How can anyone not be happy playing for Rick Adelman?"

I get a telephone call earlier today.............



It was my fellow addict calling to tell me the FICTIONAL RUMOR that Ron Artest will be shutting down anyone who wants to mess with the Rockets next year. My wildest wet dreams have come true, and I am up at 3:30 am writing this, because I CANNOT SLEEP!! This is too exciting...

I hope our buddy Thibidouhghobidiouhg in Boston will "shit his pants" when he hears the possibility of having this lineup on the floor....

Chuck Hayes PF
Shane Battier SF/SG
Ron Artest SG/SF
Rafer Alston PG

That would be his dream defensive team.... What if JVG had this? Do you think he would grow his hair back? Do you think he might sleep at night? Do you think he would come back as a defensive assistant coach?

DM is a genius. Now, match that line-up to the Boston Celtics' line-up next year, and I am willing to take my chances with whoever we have on the floor.


The Rockets need to beat the jazz every time we play them this year, including playoffs...

Get your brooms out, bitches!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

10 Years in the Future: Carl Landry Interview

Reporter: "So, Carl, after bouncing around the league for a few years, four of which spent nursing your injured knee, and three spent in the Euroleague, what have you learned from your basketball career?"

Carl: "I know how to dunk really hard, and, um, I can say "Pass me the ball" in a bunch of languages."

Reporter: "And how much money do you have left after leaving the Rockets in your second season for a higher salary?"

Carl: "I got, like, a bunch."

Reporter: "Do you regret leaving the Rockets, noting that the same season you left they signed the now 3-time Defensive Player of the Year, Ron Artest, -and- they won three back-to-back-to-back NBA Championships?"

Carl: "No, well... maybe a little. Tracy won't return my calls, but I spent that extra couple million I got that year on a fancy diamond ring. I think it looks better than a Championship ring, any day."

Ron's a Rocket!

Tracy's back always hurts, but you couldn't sit him out - who would come in to carry the load?

Yao calls out his team, saying they lack the heart to win tough playoff games.

Who's going to attack the basket, who's going to hit the open three when T Mac is doubled, who's that third scorer? Who could possibly match up with the Celtics' "Big Three?"

Did you just say Ron? Ron Artest?... A Rocket?

If I may -ahem- a quote from Lewis Carroll:

"O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"

Monday, July 28, 2008

Bike Riding with the Blazers

The hippy life in Oregon has converted Joel Pryzbilla, Greg Oden and Brandon Roy into cyclists.
"It's addictive,'' he said. "I remember being the type who would say 'Get out of the road you bike rider', but now every time I do something, it's like 'I'll ride my bike over there.' It's definitely something I know I'm going to do for the rest of my life.'' (Brandon Roy)

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

T Mac and The Onion

Houston Rockets catch Tracy McGrady...

Larry David in a Beret

Go to this page

Click on Webcast Archive: Kings-Rockets

Say Larry David three times while turning in a circle

Then pause the video at 29:09

Is that Larry David front row at a Rockets' Summer League game - in a beret?

Thursday, July 17, 2008


"The ten players named to the USA Basketball Select Team include: LaMarcus Aldridge (Portland Trail Blazers); Kevin Durant (Oklahoma City NBA); Jeff Green (Oklahoma City NBA); Luther Head (Houston Rockets); Al Horford (Atlanta Hawks); Andre Iguodala (Philadelphia 76ers); Kevin Martin (Sacramento Kings); O.J. Mayo (Memphis Grizzlies); Derrick Rose (Chicago Bulls) and Rodney Stuckey (Detroit Pistons)."(link)

"His father Richard was an absentee dad who abused drugs and once stole Rafer's Michael Jordan rookie card and other belongings and sold them on the street."(link)

"Stephen A Smith, F you. Actually, F you and anyone that employs your pathetic excuse for an NBA reporter existence. First of all, screaming something louder makes it seem more wrong, not all of the sudden un-idiotic. Second, Tracy telling you he just wants to win does NOT mean "I want to be traded". It means, I want to win. You cannot extrapolate out that now he'd "Welcome a trade to Detroit". All you can take out of that is that he wants to win, period. And guess what fuckstick, he IS winning in Houston. 55 times just last year alone, even 22 in a row. Yes, they lost in the first round, but no Yao had at least a little effect on that, don't you think? In short, you are the worst NBA reporter with any sort of exposure that I've ever seen, please stop talking completely. Actually, stop talking, writing, typing or even using sign language." (posted on The Dream Shake Blog: link)

“You always know there’s a chance you can be traded at any given time, but I felt my play wasn’t warranting me to be kicked off the team, per se. I definitely feel insulted. I felt I did everything right on and off the court for this organization. I’m still in [disbelief]. I’m still numb. I’m still in shock. Blindsided, distraught, disrespected. All those adjectives. I felt like I was the scapegoat for all the first-round exits (five since 2004). Definitely frustrated because I felt that I gave it my all."(Marcus Camby: link)

"The Los Angeles Clippers today announced that the team has signed restricted free agent guard Kelenna Azubuike to an offer sheet to a multi-year agreement. Azubuike is currently a restricted free agent who has played the last two seasons with the Golden State Warriors."(link)

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Greene's 40

Watch the entire Rockets vs. Suns 7/14 Summer League game. (Webcast Archive: Suns-Rockets)

Post game analysis:

-Rockets played no discernible defense, racking up late-rotation fouls everywhere

-Mike Harris' 21 pt, 13-board performance was overshadowed by Donte Greene's 40 pts, 5-10 from 3.

-D.J. Strawberry abused Aaron Brooks like his dad abused drugs.(cheap shot)

Visit The Dream Shake to find a link to tonight's game.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Getting a Barry Back

There was even a re-release of the video the Rockets prepared for Barry when he as let go by the Sonics last March. That one had an assortment of local athletes, including Craig Biggio and Jeff Bagwell, urging Barry to join the Rockets.

Damn! I want to see that video.

The one thing I keep envisioning is Brent and Luther playing together. With Brent handling the offensive PG duties, and Luther playing defense as the PG, the team should flow perfectly and drop tons of 3s.

Of course all the other combinations will be great, too. Tracy with any kind of help is a good thing.

I'm so happy we finally stole one of the SGs away from San Antonio. Could you imagine if it had been Finley?

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Star Signings

Official Movement of the '08 Offseason.

What kind of cigars were Baron Davis and Don Nelson smoking while they talked for two hours in Nelson's truck, banana 'rillos? Maybe Brad Miller drove down from Sacramento to join them, and that's why he got suspended.

"He came over to the office to say goodbye," Nelson said. "We had a cigar together, sat in my truck for about two hours and talked."

Warriors bring on Maggette and Turiaf, making them very deep in the SF/PF position - even after losing Pietrus to Orlando. Is Al Harrington or Stephen Jackson on the market? (UFA: Matt Barnes - 6'7, UFA: Andris Biedrins - 6'11, Al Harrington - 6'9, Richard Hendrix - 6'9, Stephen Jackson - 6'8, Anthony Randolph - 6'10, Brandan Wright - 6'9, Corey Maggette - 6'6, Ronny Turiaf - 6'10)

Do the Rockets have enough cap space to make an offer to Matt Barnes?

Clippers now have a bunch of money to throw around - Josh Smith to Hollywood?

Sixers become one of the top 5 teams in the East with Brand in the mix, on par with or better than the Wizards, Cavs and Magic. (Brand career avg. 2.1 bpg & Dalembert career avg. 2.0 bpg and '07-'08 avg. 2.3 bpg)

But don't forget about the new Raptors' frontline: Jermaine O'Neal and Chris Bosh.

Miami signs another James Posey-type in 3 pt. specialist, James Jones.

Plenty of unresolved contracts floating around, and plenty of time for deals to fall into place.

Maybe Joe Dumars was just pissed off from losing, but weren't a whole bunch of Pistons supposed to be on the way out?

Derrick Rose may take time to develop, but he won't do it on the bench as a back-up. And the Bulls aren't chasing a championship or even W's really. It should be all about building a team. This being said, is there any reason Kirk Hinrich's $10mil./yr. contract won't find its way to say... Golden State or Miami? or maybe even the Rockets, eventually? With T Mac providing most of our drive-and-kicks, wouldn't a spot up shooter be all we need at the PG? $10mil sounds like a lot to me for Hinrich. Still, alternating Skip and Kirk and maybe even Skip and Kirk together at the 1 and 2 when you go small, that would be a nice mix.

Emeka Okafor is considering his options, why not consider coming home? The Bellaire High School alumnus would make a formidable complement next to Yao, and maybe we wouldn't have to see his monster blocks on T Mac anymore.

I guess these are all just pipe dreams, but DM sees trades on the horizon.
Donaghy's sentencing postponed again? Let's hope they air the decision during Team USA's "Road to Redemption," much like the announcements from Donaghy's lawyer during the '08 Finals.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Summer League: Beasley vs. Rose

Watching the choppy, streaming video of the Miami Heat playing the Chicago Bulls in the Orlando Summer League has proven one thing to me: there will not be enough basketballs to go around in Miami.

Every trip down the court, Beasley (22 min, 9-21 FGA, 9-12 FTA, 9 reb, 28 pts) would stretch out his hands and wave at Mario Chalmers (11 pts, 6 ast, 4 stl, 1 to) as if he had to ask his kindergarten teacher for permission to go tinkle. He wanted the ball that bad.

Maybe it's because he really was the best scorer on the floor. It certainly wasn't because he had the easiest matchups; Joakim Noah and Tyrus Thomas both played for the Bulls' summer league team this year. Neither could keep Beasley from scoring. Beasley's left handed mini-hook was nice and smooth, even while being bumped around by 7 ft. Noah. His one 3-pointer was effortless and without hesitation, perfect swish.

On the court, compared to Thomas and Noah, his diminutive 6 ft. 7 in. frame did look better suited for the small forward position, but he is a tenacious rebounder. Think an inverted Chuck Hayes: offense for defense, selfishness for selflessness, tattoos and jokes for class and professionalism.

Too bad we won't get to see Beasley up against Dorsey and Greene in the Las Vegas Summer League - or at least hear about Beasley's inevitable mishaps in Vegas.

Can Wade and Marion teach Beasley to play off the ball... -way- off the ball, or will Wade's ppg. drop about 5 or 10?

Derrick who?... Honestly, there wasn't much to see from Rose (10 pts, 4 ast, 1 stl, 5 to) today. For a point guard coming in to play with some high-caliber scorers (Deng, Gordon, Hinrich) this might be a better sign than Beasley's 21 shot attempts in 22 minutes.

Funniest quote from the game's commentators was something to the effect of:
"Will Greg Oden average less than 9 fouls in this year's summer league?"(approx.)

Earnie Banks on the Chuck Wagon

An ignorant, or should I say average Rockets fan wrote this.....

ive already got my tickets for summer league and can't wait to see how the new guys adjust to different coaching systems. are we really going to play dorsey at the 5??go ahead and trade chuck hayes for a bag of oats. the guy sucks and it's a shame things like "intangibles" keep you guys from telling it like it is.

Jonathan Feigan responded with THIS....

A few weeks ago, I was visiting with Tom Thibodeau, the former [Rockets] assistant that ran the Celtics defense. I mentioned to him that it was really something to see that defense he and Jeff always ran with the Rockets work with a long and active four like Kevin Garnett, the Defensive Player of the Year. He said a few words about Garnett, particularly about his practice habits and consistent effort and then launched into a long spiel about Chuck Hayes, his style, his strengths, the ways they could defend because they had him. I never mentioned Hayes or the Rockets. We all know there are things Hayes cannot do, but the qualities Tom talked about were very tangible. Clearly, he disagreed with your assessment that Hayes sucks, but what does he know about NBA defense. It's not as if he will ever win anything as a coach in this league. As for Ridnour, I don't think they would spend their summer allowance on a backup point guard. -- Jonathan

-Earnie Banks


Who Chuck Hayes is.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

alright, I know DM is a genuis and all and would never give up our young, incredibly althetic PFs for Robert Horry... BUT for any dumbass out there that thinks we should...go to hell. Chuck Hayes is the man, just ask Tippytoe from the Boston Celtics defense corner....

For all the Horry lovers...If you are gonna try and get Horry back...WHY NOT JUST SCREW HORRY AND GO FOR THE REAL DEAL DENACE THE MENACE RODMAN!!!

Alright I apologize...but really after watching that... How great would he be for us. I mean, maybe not that great... But no one would really screw with Yao and therefore, he would be healthy...

Im just sayin....
Las Vegas Summer League Schedule released.

Rockets play the Suns, Cavs, Wizards and Kings.

Highest draft picks playing against the Rockets' summer league squad will be Robin Lopez (PF/C) on the Suns and Jason Thompson (PF) on the Kings.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

R.I.P. Seattle SuperSonics

USA goes semi-small in the frontcourt, let's see what bigs might show up around the globe.

Germany: Chris Kaman and Dirk Nowitzki
China: Yao Ming and Yi Jianlian
Argentina: Fabricio Oberto and Luis Scola
Canada: Samuel Dalembert and Joel Anthony
Spain: Pau Gasol and Marc Gasol
Italy: Andrea Bargnani and Danilo Gailinari

Not sure if these teams are all going to be playing, and some (Yi, Danilo, and Marc) might not be starters at the PF.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Donate to Yao's Foundation

Donate to Yao's foundation and have a chance to win tickets to the USA vs. China Olympics Basketball game(including airfare, travel expenses, hotel, etc.) and tickets to a Rockets game.

$2 per ticket at 5 tickets

$1.50 per ticket at 10 tickets

$1.25 at 20 tickets

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

General Takes Charge of NBA Officiating

TrueHoop post TrueHoop on NBA's New Sr. V.P of Referee Operations Call-by-call breakdown of Dallas vs. Miami Finals Game 5

"Beech also looked for any and all evidence to support Donaghy's claim that two of the referees were "company men" who did the NBA's bidding. It was hard to see that in how each referees calls broke down. Referee Bob Delaney, Beech found, called the game quite evenly. Ted Bernhardt's calls slightly favored the Lakers, and Dick Bavetta's calls, especially late in the game, were
more in favor of the Lakers than anyone.
"(Henry Abbott on's Beech covering controversial Lakers vs. Kings)

Also on

The Best and Worst Defensive Adjusted Plus/Minus Ratings:SMALL FORWARDS
#1: Shane Battier
#2: Andre Kirilenko...
#5: Paul Pierce...
#8: Bruce Bowen

The Best and Worst Defensive Adjusted Plus/Minus Ratings:CENTERS
#2: Dikembe Motumbo

Yao is statistically tied with Baron Davis as the 17th Most Clutch Players in the NBA last season, while T Mac is the 37th.
. . . .

The Carl Landry situation is troubling. If, for some reason, the Rockets deem Landry's knee too much of a gamble to pay for, are we going to be regretting it for the rest of Landry's career?
Just imagine those vicious dunks coming on top of Luis or Yao.
And think of the nice looking jump shot he's already got and how much he can improve it.
I know we're always tentative about signing another injury prone player(ie: Yao/TMac), but I'd take the risk and sign Landry.

Coming out of this offseason with just Brent Barry and no Carl Landry would be a huge mistake.

Houston only ranks 7th in America's sweatiest cities?